On love

As weird as it may sound, and despite my young age, I believe I have a slightly good idea of what love is. While experience here may be a limited resource upon which to base all my descriptions and life surely holds more stories ahead, there are some bare and brief ideas that hopefully sketch the main traits of this particularly special feeling. The one and only behind both sublime creation and reckless destruction.

Among the many kinds that could be mentioned, there are some considerably remarkable during any person’s life. First there is teenage love. The purest after the mom-child one. After all, there is nothing more in this kind of affection than a sudden realization, the first infatuation. Then it all comes down to caressing, kindly kissing and holding hands. Nonsense is the best topic, and hanging around the best use of time. It fills a still-growing body and as result it floods it. There are no worries about future, long-term goals or carefully crafted plans. It is just about those eyes, that smile, the brief hours together. It is no surprise that once it is over it becomes a reference for life, and to be honest, that is only barely fair. With it boys and girls around the world learn the other meaning of the word fly.

And yet that one is not the strongest, most intense type of love a human will ever experience. That is the young adult love, the one that aims to transform the world one kiss at a time. Here challenges are mere obstacles to go through, thanks to this force discreetly contained in a pair of minds, bodies and souls. Lust, passion, fun, tenderness, commitment, beauty, youth, boldness, and attitude: every feeling and attitude is present to create a bond so strong it can blend lives forever or create a new one. Because of this, it is likely to become a major event in anyone’s life. Without prior notice, it poses the question to either give all or nothing, risking a life full of pleasures in exchange of a slim chance to get the greatest good ever conceived. The eyes that once made a boy dream, now urge a man to express a message more intense than any prose or rhyme the mouth could ever pronounce. At times they make it on time, however there are others where tears have to help the feelings escape as grief takes over. Unfortunately, it is slowly becoming tougher to reach and scarcer, and this is not because all of a sudden humans are less prone to match, but because of the selfish environment, full of fear and distrust, we are little by little building.

Among the darker varieties, one can mention the love that will never be. The unique and cruel realization it provokes once it is clear that it dwelled just inside one heart is probably one of the first memorable sorrows that will accompany a human being for life. More devastating perhaps is this kind of love when it comes back after sometime, right in time to remind the victim that it never really faded away. Hard to get over, it becomes lethally dangerous when the muse behind it never ceases to be nice. Enigmatic addiction, it may be the end for the ones that never realize that despite of their efforts, not all dreams come true.

It hurts and reliefs, haunts and inspires, betters and dooms, burns and soothes. It is the favorite paradox of mankind, one of the few remaining reasons for anyone to get back at least momentarily beneath the moonlight. An enigmatic path to divine realization, an energy so strong to last forever while revolving everything around. Hopefully I will decipher one day all its subtleties and intricacies, from the words that make it blossom, to the exact spots where skins has to be touched to make it last. Hopefully these revelations will arrive soon, right in time for me to share them with the most gracious, beautiful, wise, fun, sweet, kind, and nice girl my being will ever witness. The one and only. My partner for life.

Glimpse of a future life

Wouldn't it be great, just for one time, to stand on top of this luxurious skycraper, watching the day fade out, letting light to be gone and the city to embrace night. Covered with the softness of various clothes, perceiving and directing the beat of life of this glorious empire. The land needing to be tamed, watching over it, at the place where decissions are made and ideas arise.

Were it a wine glass or cocoa cup, warm or cold, the feeling wind at those heights give, would be impossible to leave behind. From that day on, sky would not be but the lower limit. Finally a hidden ruler, with inner fairness and good willing, taught the ancient secrets, could look after the powerful mankind that it first gave him life.

Never let your stories end.

When we are children we are taught basic facts about life that let us better behave and interact with the people around us. Things like wearing appropriate clothes, avoid expecting big gifts or hearing twice the amount we speak are fundamental tips that later in life determine whether we are good getting on with people or not.

(CC) San Jose Library/Flickr

However, along with those truths there are certain mistakes we learn through very subtle details. One of those comes up every night as we wait sleepiness to come, when we imagine our happiest dreams that might influence the rest of our lives. Thanks to fairy tales we learn notions of good and evil, of heroes, princesses and monsters but also that every single story has to come to an end.

An ending that must immediately follow the achievement of joy or the solution of our main conflict, the "natural" consequence of defeating challenges, the "and they lived happily ever after" we always want to hear, and even more when we grow up, to live.

Bleu, white y rojo

Bleu

Au début tout est étonnant. Même les choses les plus courants ont un air d’élegance. Par exemple, les manteaux remplissent deux fonctionnes: celle de protéger du froid  et celle d’exprimer l’attitude plutôt respecteuse entre inconnus. Les rues sont l’espace parfait pour réfléchir et s’exprimer avec toute liberté (mais pas en haute voix) puisque c’est là où il n’y a pas de but défini. Après ces pensées reviendront l’inspiration pour créer l’image idéale: ici c’est comme ça. La beauté, de la même manière que le travail, la santé ou les loisir, exige d’y penser en avance. À la fin tout est planifié, “lu et approuvé”, mais malgré cette planification il y a encore des erreurs. La naïveté d’avoir une identité aussi riche et diverse pose des difficultés à ceux qui veulent la maitrîser.

Comme résultat on voit une jeunesse vivante et confiante mais qui se trompe là où leur parents réussissaient: Les vestes et les cravats ne peuvent pas contrôler les nouveaux comportements, beaucoup plus dégueulasses et pérvers. Des verres qui se cassent, des bouteilles qui sont vidées tout de suite. Le dîner devient un champ de bataille, la nuit c’est l’échappe d’une vie que ne satisfait personne.

White

Either because they were raised with the idea of a single language belonging to a clearly defined territory or due to the effort it takes to get out of one’s habits, most people prefer to avoid risky idiomatic adventures. If all we get is a chaotic exchange of expressions separated by unconfortable pauses, then its better to remain silent hoping somebody that trully speaks our language arrives.

Among men

(CC) erix!/Flickr

Nobody really knows how it happens, they just attend to a call that every now and then a probably deeply concerned guy from the very farthest future makes. Using technology even the most educated men can't even conceive, he brings together men from all times and places in a sort of gender meeting to discuss the undoubted ultimate question for their own definition, neatly written and explained in as many languages as needed on a sheet of paper always located right in the center of this meeting point:

What you ought and what you actually do

Whenever you have this feeling you wonder: Is this the way i am supposed to feel? You know, there´s a lot of bad stuff going on anywhere you look at: slaughtery, desperation, poverty, injustice taken to the worst level ever witnessed… But there’s also a lot of reasons to smile: Have you ever felt such great affection? I mean, all of a sudden there’s a big sense of friendship going all over every single guy or girl you know, enhancing the chances to spend memorable times. A phrase here, a look there, true signs of trust and love that are given in such an easy manner that it’s impossible not to put your mind at ease with such great gifts.

And so there’s a constrast between what you ought and what you actually do. No matter how far you look for, it happens the same with religious beliefs and moral choices; formal sensitive responses and real emotional actions. There’s always a huge difference that can either lead you to grief and responsability or amusement and inconsistency.

It seems as the latter was needed in order to cope with misery and despair. Is it then that good has to be founded on the basis of common indifference? Should hipocresy and its followers be the hope of mankind to restablish a long lost and greatly needed order?

Could it be possible that good will can be preserved in the middle of vile and cruel thinking? Could this be the path the true hero has to follow in order to defeat the unbeatable beast in which global domination has turned?

Again we can either laugh and love or sob and suffer.

Support

In spite all the pieces seem to be matching i’m still hesitating about those that belong to you. Suddenly, while facing the group, trying to make my point about fairness, I found myself awkwardly wondering… Am i not giving enough support to her?

So far i’ve come to the idea that i’d practically give anything, ever since there’s something that tells me that what’s happening might be much bigger than what it seems at glance. I’ve come to trust your voice, and believe your speech, though at times, just like today’s trial, i imagine, not without facts, that i might well be a puppet serving different interests than those i’ve acknowledged...

Yet i don’t want to retreat, i’d rather know the truth than assume my thought is certain. I better stay by your side coping with misadventures to turn the so-called dream an everyday phenomenon than getting away in an attempt to preserve my exposed feelings. Having the offer to become a non believer, i prefer to believe. Because if i can commit that easy, surpassing the common distrust i tend to have, it must be due to some overwhelming and not so obvious reasons.

There’s a journey that may enlighten the unknown and blessed path, whose chances to be are unhappily diminishing..

However, i’d be really deceived if i knew this is all fake,nothing more than a sellfish will to promote your wishes in which i’m nothing but a fool blindly playing the role it has been given. My mind, my words, my dream all would then be wasted in innocent prayers, summoning a hope that would had never come…